Luke Waterwalker: The Screenplay

	-person running

	-credit

	-person running

	-credit

	-person running

	-credit

	-person running by pool

	-credit

	-Luke jumps off of diving board

	-title

	-Luke walks across pool.

	-cut to Luke sleeping in hammock, falls out, gets up, walks out
 	door, [dub] 	zip, potty, flush [end dub]

	-Luke starts walking down stairs, looks at shorts, [dub] zip 
	[end dub]

	-Luke walks into resturaunt

Luke: Hi Mortimer

Mortimer: Hi Luke. The usuall?

Luke:  Ya.

	-Mortimer puts bowl, spoon, box of cereal, and milk on counter 
	and walks away

Luke:  Thanks.

	-Luke puts bowl on head, spoon down pants, dumps cereal on bar,
	 fills box with milk, eats box. picture goes out of focus

	-sign says "flashbackÓ

Voice: I remember now to when I was a child. I was so handsome then

	-cut to hospital bed with Luke's mom in it, Dr. 1. walks in

Dr. 1: I have some bad news, your son is dead.

Mom: {gasp}

Dr. 1: Just kidding

	-mom pulls out gun and shoots Dr. 1, Dr. 1 pulls sheet of 
	metal out of his coat

Dr. 1: Your son was born without feet, we had to operate. 

Mom:   How'd you do that?

Dr. 1: It took a chain saw and a hell of a lot of glue. But now the 
	body is ejecting the feet.

	-cut to scene with baby Luke on a table and Dr. beside it

Voice: The doctors were incompetent. Crazy glue wouldn't do it.

	-Dr. 2 puts foot on Luke's "stump" and it falls off

Dr. 2: The body is rejecting the feet. We need more glue.

Voice: It was a job for Elmers

	-Cut to Dr. 1 & mom

Dr. 1: We're going to have to give him antibiotics.

Mom: Oh No!

	-cut to scene showing a tray with 2 syringes on it...

Voice:  My antibiotics were on a tray with a liquid helium syringe 
	When an incompetent nurse came in and picked up the tray. 
	She had whirled around to fast and the syringes were hurled 
	to the ground. Afraid someone might see her she sprang to the
	ground and cluched feverishley at the syringes. She switched 
	my atibiotics with the liquid helium without realizing her
	incompetent mistake.

	-cut back to baby Luke with nurse

Voice: She injected the liquid helium in my feet instead of my antibiotics. 

Nurse: {gasp}

Voice: When she realized what she had done she deposited the seringe 
	in her blouse and scurried of into the sunset never to be 
	heard from again.

	-go back to dr. 1 & mom scene

Dr. 1: We accidentley injected liqiud helium in yours sons feet instead 
	of antibiotics. I don't think your son will ever walk again. 

Mom: {gasp, cough} My dad didn't take it so hot.

	-cut to man sitting in chair

Dad: I can't take it any more!

	-Man (Lukes dad) stabs himself

Voice: My mom on the the other hand took it quite well.,

	-mom pours gasoline on herself and lights match

Dr. 1: Just kidding!

Mom: Gasp!

	-explosion

	-sign says "end flashbackÓ

Voice: I was left an orphan, but the helium in my feet, being lighter 
	than water, gave me superhuman powers to walk on water.

	-fade out

	-fade in to Luke eating last piece of box with a dribble of milk 
	on chin. Takes bowl off head, gets up, starts to walk off, 
	[dub] clink, clink [end dub] spoon falls out of shorts. Zoom 
	to spoon cut

	-Luke is walking along street when he hears screem, Luke looks 
	up and sees building on fire.

Luke: Don't worry, good shall triump over evil.

	-Luke jumps through door [dub] flush lend dub] comes out in costume

Luke: I will rescue you from that burning oven of death, I will preval, 
	I am about to save you from the burning agany that awaits you, 
	My water blaster canÉ  

person: Would you please shutup you incompetent super-hero and rescue me

Luke: Sure thing you worthlessÉOh nevermind

-[dub] zip, potty [end dub]

Luke: quick, jump in this puddle, it shall break your fall.

Person: Oh thank you

-Person jumps out of building and lands in water

Person: this is great, but ... I can't swim

Luke: Don't worry, I will save you from that watery grave, I will prevail, 
	I am about to save you from the agany of water filling your lungs, 
	my water blaster canÉ  

Person: Would you please shutup you incomptent super-hero and rescue me

Luke: Sure thing you worthless oh nevermind

-Luke walks on water, picks up person, walks off water

person: Who are you

Luke: Who, me? Why I'm...

-cut to shot looking up at luke with fan blowing on him.

Luke: LUKE WATERWALKER.

-cut to man with costume (pyro man)

Pyro: you have foiled my sinister plan to have the largest barbeque in 
	the world. Now what will I do with all off these marshmallows.

-pyro holds up bag of marshmallows

Luke: Stand back little missy, who are you

-luke knocks person into pool

Pyro: Who me? Why I'm PYRO-MAN. Why don't you stick around for a while.

-throws bag of marshmallows at luke

Luke: I'm stuck

Pyro: now I shall escape

-pyro man gets into pyromobile and runs over luke

-cut to luke, gets up, dusts himself off, has tire tracks on him

-shows car driving on road, in jungle, desert, and on moon ...

Figurine: the Eagle has

-car runs over figurine

Figurine: been squashed

-car runs into secret passage that leads to secret hideout twice, door
	opens, car starts to go into the door but doors close on car

pyro: Damn this door! I meant to get it fixed a
week ago.

-pyromobile pulls up to secret base

-cut to passage way, pyro walks through door

-go to living room with fire place, light fire,
sit in couch, puts pet dog in lap

pyro: Oh sparky, How I do love to set fires and watch them burn, but now
	there is a new threat to my life's dream, PYRO-LAND

-throws dog [dub] bark [end dub] pulls roll of paper out from behind, 
	unrolls it

Pyro: It's fun and enjoyment for the whole family, and where the first 
	one-hundred people get free blow torches for the kiddies!

-Luke runs behind wall [dub] moo! [end dub] runs out other side in 
	regular close. climbs up ladder and goes in window.

Luke: I must capture this villian and turn him over to the athorities. 
	Although I would like to tear the worthles, Oh never mind. I 
	must wait for him to make his move and then catch him.

news: There is another unexplaned fire, this time at the San Diego 
	convention center. The authorities have no clue to what is 
	happenning, then again, do they ever?

-Police officer walks onto news broadcast

cop: Got any donuts?

-cut to convention center. Luke walks on.

Luke: I have a feelinq Pyro man has been here.

-cut to shot of sign saying pyro man was here.

-cut back to Luke. Luke writes his name on the wall. Luke hides 
	behind trash can.

-pyro comes in and sees lukes name on the wall

pyro: I have a strange feeling Luke Waterwalkers been here.

-pyro gets into car and luke gets on back. Car drives on road with a 
	giant cat in the middle of the street

pyro: Damn that Bob & Dick

-Cut to Dick scene, you know what I mean

Dick: Bob, we have a problem 

Bob: Dick, what is it 

Dick: Well Bob, What I'd like to know is, what ever happened to 
	that gigantic cat?

Bob: What kind of cat, Dick?

Dick: Big ones, Bob. 

Bob: Holy [dub] beeeep [end dub]

-Dick looks both ways

Dick: Uh, oh

-turns camera off

-cut back to car scene, forest, desert, and moon with a g.i. joe 
	figurine being dragged on back. Car goes through door but 
	door closes on g.i. joe figurine.

-luke gets up, dusts himself off, pulls rope out from behind his 
	cape, throws rope over wall , climbs up wall, falls off wall 
	gets up, dusts himself off, pyro man comes 

pyro. I've been expecting you 
{sub. mesage} I read the script 

Luke: Prepare to die.
{sub. message} What do you want on your tombstone

-fight scene Luke gets nocked to ground

Pyro: Soon you will be among the non living
{sub. mesage} Hmmm... Peperoni & sausage

-Pyro man holds up a ball of fire. [intermissioin]

Luke: you will not kill me.
{sub. mesage} I have a contract

-It starts to rain

pyro: Argh! I hate the rain!

-pyro turns to run

Luke: Pardon me, but does there happen to be a pay phone around here? 
	and if so, may I be so bold as to ask for a quarter?

Pyro: But of course, it is around the corner.

-Pyro takes a quarter out of his pocket and flips it to Luke, luke 
	catches it and walks away, Pyro runs off screen screaming.

-Luke walks off screen. cut to shot of luke going threw window, 
	gets on knees next to picture with 2 candles next to it

Luke: Oh master, I have failed you greatly

Voice: Do not despair luke, come to me and I will teach you the 
	acient art of abu dabu dibi

Luke: I'll be right there

-Luke walks through jungle and comes out in his old master home.

Luke:  Master, I have arrived

Master: I've been expecting you

Luke: let me guess, you read the script

Master: No, I called for you, remember

Luke: oh ya

Master: Now we must train

-training

-pyro

-training

-pyro

-training

-Pyro

-training

-Pyro

Master: You have done very well my son, but you have one lesson 
	yet to learn, the art of sinking.

Luke:	No it is to soon. I must go now. There is work to be done.

	-luke runs off

Master: He is not ready.

	-Luke goes home and gets alot of guns

Luke:	I'm coming for you pyro man.

	-Luke parachutes into pyro mans base and shoots things drops 
	all of his guns

Luke:	Pyro Man Show yourself

	-Pyro man walks out of door [dub] zip [end dub] looks up scream 
	and runs in door

Luke:	hay come back here

	-Luke runs after pyro cut to shot of building with two people 
	on top. cut to shot of pyro man and Luke.

Pyro: So, we meet again
	{sub message} I'll have a big mac and large fries

Luke:	Yes, and for the last time
	{sub. message! We're running out of dumb sayings

	-fight scene, pyro gets luke cornered last gun was nocked to ground

pyro:	Soon I shall kill you, but first let me tell you how I became 
	pyro-man, you see, in preschool ...

	-sign says One hour later

pyro:	and thats how I became pyro-man.

	- luke wakes up from a nap

Luke:	huh? sure whatever you say.

Pyro:	I hope to see you in another life.
{sub mesage} IÕll have my people call your people and we'll do brunch.

Luke: IÕll see you in hell.
{sub mesage} sure thing you worthless, oh nevermind.

-Luke starts to use powers to get gun

Pyro: I've been waiting for this moment a long time.

-gun flies up and hits pyro man in head. pyro man falls off building.

Luke: Pretty predictable ending huh.

-cut to shot of whole building plane flies by nocks luke off.

-pyro-man and luke are falling

pyro & luke: I'm falling!

-they look at each other

pyro & luke: We're falling

-luke stops yelling, [dub] zip, potty [end dub] pyro stops yelling, looks 
	down at luke, looks up, starts yelling again. [dub] zip [end dub]

-pyro falls on ground, luke falls in water, pyro looks up

pyro:  ouch

-pyro dies, luke gets out of water

Voice: you have done well my son

-credits